40 Questions for 2011

I've always been a little slow on the uptake when it comes to being on time for things (in certain avenues of my life), so don't be surprised this list isn't showing up until now. I happened to read this list on my friend DJ's blog at http://martiandanceinvasion.blogspot.com, and thought it would be fun to re-count my last year - even though it's a little late.

  

01.  What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?

Fell utterly, completely, head over heels in love. 

Mike and I, at our crew Halloween party, where I dressed as Miss Argentina from Beetlejuice and he dressed as Mario.

02.  Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I don’t typically have new years’ resolutions, so I can’t say I kept or didn’t keep any. This year, I’d just like to maintain the life I’ve been working so hard to build over the past few, and just stay happy. That’s all I’d really like.

03.  Did anyone close to you give birth?

Nope.

04.  Did anyone close to you die?

Nope.

05.  What countries did you visit?

None. The farthest I traveled for a trip was Green Bay, WI – my homeland, which is a drive of about two hours.

06.  What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?

A bigger apartment! And as it turns out, I’m getting one on March 1.

07.  What date from 2011 will remain etched in your memory, and why?

There are a few, for sure. For one, the date of the surgery I had in October (10/17/11), and my anniversary date (10/15/11).

08.  What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Transferring out of a job I absolutely could not stand in order to start from scratch 100% in an area I knew nothing about, and being incredibly successful at it. I went from being a secretary to working in auto parts in a matter of months, and I’m having an absolute blast.

09.  What was your biggest failure?

I don’t believe in failures. I can’t think of one thing I didn’t try my best at all year – and sometimes things just don’t go as planned. But I certainly don’t feel like I ‘failed’ anywhere.

10.  Did you suffer illness or injury?

In October, I had surgery to remove a Stage 1 melanoma that I found inside of one of my tattoos. That was one of the scariest moments I’ve had in a long while, for sure.

11.  What was the best thing you bought?

I can’t really pinpoint anything specific that I bought for myself. Once and awhile, I like to take extra money and spend a little bit on myself here and there for some new clothes, makeup, or something like that. I also paid a lot of debt back this year, and my credit score is definitely better off for it.

12.  Whose behavior merited celebration?

The men and women responsible for the Alford plea that freed the West Memphis Three after nearly 20 years behind bars.

13.  Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Scott Walker. As a public employee, I’m living first hand with the changes he’s made, and let me tell you – it sucks.

14.  Where did most of your money go?

Bills and paying back old debt. It’s difficult to not have a lot of extra, but when I think about the fact that I’m improving my life, making up for old mistakes, and carving out a future for myself, not having extra money seems pretty alright.

15.  What did you get really, really, really excited about?

My new work opportunity, my new relationship… all of the above. I’m finally becoming the person that I’ve always wanted to be, and it’s a wonderful feeling.

16.  What song will always remind you of 2011?

I hate questions like this, because I can never think of a single song that encompasses a whole year. This time, though, I can say that The Loved Ones’ “Distracted” got enough listens to merit reminding me of this year.

17.  Compared to this time last year, you are:

a.       Hotter or colder? Prettymuch the same.

b.      Fatter or thinner? See above.

c.       More active or lazier? See above.

18.  What do you wish you’d done more of?

Being active.

19.  What do you wish you’d done less of?

Toward the beginning of the year, drinking – once I curbed that and changed things for the better, I haven’t looked back.

20.  How will you be spending/did you spend Christmas?

Mike and I spent Christmas Eve in Green Bay with my family for dinner, and Christmas Day in the morning with my extended family and evening with his. It made for a very long day, but it was good to be able to make the time to see everyone.

21.  Did you fall in love in 2011?

That I did.

22.  How many one-night stands?

Zero.

23.  What was your favorite TV program?

Sons of Anarchy, bar none. I started watching it via renting season 1 from the library early in the year, got hooked, and wound up watching all three existing seasons before season 4 started this past year.

24.  Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Not that I can think of.

25.  What was the best book you read?

Currently reading “My Horizontal Life” by Chelsea Handler via Kindle.

26.  What was your greatest musical discovery?

In late summer/early fall I really re-discovered punk music, so I’d say that counts. I’ve been staying pretty close to the music I know lately, since new music (especially music on the radio) is absolutely awful. I’ve also taken to unabashedly falling back in love with ridiculous music from the 90’s.

27.  What did you want and get?

I’ve wanted a Nintendo Wii for years, but never had the extra money laying around to actually buy one. I told Mike this while we were shopping on Black Friday and opened one up for Christmas!

28.  What did you want and not get?

I try not to want for much.

29.  What was your favorite film of this year?

Pretty sure it doesn’t count, but The Other Guys was pretty great. I haven’t been to the movies in a long time.

30.  What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

Since my birthday was on a Saturday this year, I had a Friday night dinner and bowling with friends in Milwaukee, and spent Saturday night drinking my face off in Green Bay. I turned 26 – or rather it was my 5^th annual 21^st birthday.

31.  What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Thinking about it, I’d say I had a pretty successful, satisfying year.

32.  How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?

Jeans, t-shirts, shades of gray and black. I’d say that about covers it.

33.  What kept you sane?

Knitting, new friends, and new opportunities. Oh yeah, and my cats.

34.  Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

I try not to get too wrapped up in the celebrity world.

35.  What was your favorite video game of the year?

It has been such a long time since I’ve played any new video games, I really couldn’t say – after I got my Wii, though, I started playing Cooking Mama again, which is pretty ridiculous in and of itself.

36.  Who has made the most cameos in your dreams this year?

To be honest, I don’t dream all that often, and none of them stick out.

37.  Who did you miss?

In quitting drinking for the most part, I’m not up in Green Bay as often as I once was, so I miss my friends there and my family, for sure.

38.  Who was the best new person you met?

My boyfriend, Mike. By a landslide.

39.  Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011:

Drinking isn’t everything, and finding friends to rely on has helped me more than I can explain.

40.  Quote a song that sums up your year:

The Limousines’ “Get Sharp”.

On writing.

Words have always meant the world to me. They have been my only friend, my solace, and my weapon when I needed one. Being able to write down my thoughts and feelings, even if only for my own eyes, has always brought me peace. In recent years, that peace has been disturbed and replaced with the turmoil of the worst creative block I have ever lived with.

Growing up, I always carried pen and paper with me. If I needed to jot down an idea that came into my head, I would refer to it later. I would refine and mold those ideas into something either spectacular or awful, though I was the only judge, since most of my works didn't reach the eyes of others until many years later.

I grew comfortable writing stories about other people - their struggles, their strife, their accomplishments. Writing someone else's story makes it very easy to forget your own, and unfortunately, I fell victim to that trap. While promoting the works of others, I forgot about myself.

At twenty-five years of age, I am now five years from my last nationally published writing work. Tonight, I broke out my paper portfolio and flipped through the pages, remembering how it felt every time I ran to a bookstore in search of one of my pieces. I would look through the magazine racks in calculation, looking for that fresh, crisp cover. Once I had it in my hands, I would flip through each and every page until reading my name. I didn't care about the editing or how my words may have changed. Seeing my name in something that reached beyond either my computer screen or shelf of notebooks was, and has always been, incredibly surreal. It has given me a sense of accomplishment unmatched by anything before or since. It has been everything to me.

For years, it was my identity. I was hungry to do more and be more, though continued to write humbling album and product reviews and sidebars. I grew complacent. Once in a great while, I would receive e-mail from an editor or reader praising my work, and even asking how I got where I was. It was both refreshing and inspiring, and I have always loved to share my experience with others.

Writing has never been easy for me, especially not emotionally. In recent years, I fell victim to the trap of not feeling good enough, not wanting to put myself out there in fear of ridicule or negativity. I have struggled since my last article was published in 2008 to shut off the part of my personality that has grown to need that validation.

Apparently, that switch is irrevocably broken.

In order to regain my comfort and focus, I opted to start at the beginning of my freelance writing career once again - AMP Magazine, based out of California. I picked up an interview for their upcoming issue, and will be working on that in the week to come. The familiarity of working with someone I grew used to as an editor, and the routine of a magazine I got to know very well makes me feel safe. I know what I'm doing, as I've done the same thing many times prior.

Not long after taking on this project, I sent off an e-mail to a fellow freelancer about taking part in a tattoo-related article she is working on for another publication - an article that has become near to my heart in the past weeks, certainly. Just this evening, I was on the receiving end of interview questions. Once it was finished, we planned upcoming collaborations, as well. Keep your eye on this space, as once I have more information I will be happy to give it.

Even if you give up on your story, your story will never give up on you. Don't get bored. Keep doing what you love, no matter what anyone, and most of all, your head tells you. Life life with head held high. Get rad and stay that way, it's the only way you'll survive.